Saturday, May 19, 2007
Mes amis, mes amis, et plus de mes amis
(Warning: Long post, pictures galore!)
My aunt: So she (the kid cousin pictured above) was singing the "A-B-C" song while I gave her a bath, and I think the water got a little too hot. So her song became, "A B C D E F G, HOT HOT HOT, IT'S BURNING ME! Still in tune, no less!"
Kids are definitely getting smarter these days.
Anyway, I haven't posted in a while because I've been busy bumming, and I thought I'll do a fairly light-hearted post today. Topic? My friends! People who keep me smiling or laughing, and hopefully I've made you smile/laugh in the time that we hung out together!
With Yanyan and Weiwei/roomie, ex-JC-classmates in NTU, freshman year.
Personally, I have nothing against double-word names, but I realized that when they outnumber you in your group, somehow, you end up having a double-word name too. Which is why I'm known as Wenwen (gosh) in this merry group of people. Even poor Sharie became Shasha. And she's not even Chinese.
Weiwei and Sharie a.k.a Shasha a.k.a Shaz
It's a fairly diverse group here though, since we have a Malaysian giraffe who speaks butchered Mandarin, a fairly violent Singaporean dwarf, a lazy/slacker Singaporean who spends too much time online, and a Filipino who can't speak Tagalog, speaks butchered Malay and Mandarin, and is (was) a punkrock chick turned advertising girl.
One thing we all love? Duck porridge in ACJC's canteen. Plus egg.
And I'll also never forget the time that glam rock chick Shaz unglam-ly kicked her shoe off her foot to a spot three feet away from her when she made an abrupt turn.
Weiwei was also the reason that we got caught when cheating at running laps on the track. She was so tall anyone could spot us from a mile. (Fifty straddles, my friends, FIFTY!)
Moving on, to RV friends. Well no one ever guesses I'm from RV (probably because of my bad Mandarin) but the school's really where most of my so-called havoc years occured (with the exception of that bench/fence climbing incident in JC to get out of going for a rugby game).
Secondary schools is where some classmates got sent out of class on a daily basis.
One classmate brought a pillow to class, set up a pseudo-express-manicure station in one corner of the classroom, and has a huge box full of confiscated items (still) with the discipline mistress.
Another classmate slipped her pager onto the seat of the student in front to avoid detection during a classroom spot-check. She whispered to him not to sit on her pager. The pager ended up sat upon and broken.
Another classmate made a teacher cry and flee from the classroom in terror.
Yet ANOTHER classmate got the ENTIRE CLASS SENT TO DETENTION.
These are just the tip of the iceberg, my friends. Here's an example of what goes on in class during a typical lesson.
Example 1: Chinese lesson, in Mandarin
Teacher: Name the person who traveled to the West to get the Scriptures?
(Ans: Tang San Zhang, from Journey to the West)
Jiahe: I know, I know! (raises and waves hand frantically)
Teacher: Yes, Jiahe?
Jiahe: DALAI LAMA!
(At this point obviously the class bursts out into laughter, and the teacher is giving the steely look of displeasure, and Jiahe realizes his mistake.)
Teacher: Wrong.
Jiahe: Oh, no no I know, I know.
Teacher: Are you certain?
Jiahe: Yes I'm sure. It's ... JIN LUN FA WANG!!
(Channel 8's Legend of the Condor Heroes was super hot at that time, with Fann Wong et al.)
Teacher: Jiahe, chu qu wai mian zhan!!
(Jiahe, go and stand outside the classroom!!)
Example 2: Chinese lesson (again)
Teacher: Which river did Qu Yuan jump into to kill himself?It's no coincidence that it's the same few students who get themselves thrown out of the class. But of course, almost everyone in the class had their fair share of punishments, even the class chairperson. After a rigorous Physics pop quiz by a fairly scary teacher, who was subbing for our teacher, HALF the class had been sent out, while half the remaining people in the class were standing at their seats.
(Ans: Mi Luo Jiang)
Jiahe: I know! I know!!
Teacher: Jiahe?
Jiahe: Wang Lu Jiang!
(Bryan Wong, Ch 8 TV host)
Teacher: Jiahe, chu qu wai mian zhan!!
(Jiahe, go and stand outside the classroom!!)
Anyway if you're interested enough to know, Jiahe is none other than Mr Pang-seh King, a.k.a Ian (first from left in the above picture). He used to frisk like a lamb in the corridors. And he is a damn convincing actor, even fooling the discipline mistress ("Sob sob... my mother... she's .... sh-she's ILL!! ... BAAWWWWLLLLL!!!...)
Next to him is Ah Fee a.k.a Fee-ster, Chinese rep, super guai-kia who is at the top of my List of Smart People to Borrow Homework from to Copy Furiously Before Class. She may look guai, but DO NOT BE DECEIVED. This woman is really quite mad. Like they say, it's the quiet ones you must be careful of. Don't ever try to be funny with her because she's gonna beat you about the head with the emergency baguette that she always has stored in her little bag.
And girl in specs is Wansi, chemist and drummer extraordinare. Another of the quiet ones, but nowhere near guai. Mark my words.
More RV people from the last year's Quindance (thank god no uniforms):
SR, who was Ian/Jiahe's partner-in-crime, used to be the butt of our jokes, mostly because he was kinda small-sized. More importantly, he wore really short shorts and liked to wiggle his gluteus maximus. But then again, he's now all tall, muscular and grown up, and we still laugh at him. SR has another name that we all use, but as I do not wish to be offed by him at 22, I will not put his name up for public viewing.
Jessica is another of those fake guai-kias. She was one of the rare few students content to sit in the front row, right under the teacher's nose, because she was always surreptitiously reading some trashy novel hidden under her desk. And because she was right in front, the teacher couldn't see it.
Wong the lawyer is also the most disgraceful lawyer Singapore will ever see, mostly because I know every stupid thing she did in school. The form teacher used to call her 'la1 ta4'. Knowing that the fate of criminals, victims and other random people will lie in her ability to practice the law does nothing for my faith in the legal system.
Incidentally, she was also the one who got the whole class hauled to detention.
Moving on once more, to college and beyond. (Sorry if I miss you out, there are too many to mention!)
Jessica is another of those fake guai-kias. She was one of the rare few students content to sit in the front row, right under the teacher's nose, because she was always surreptitiously reading some trashy novel hidden under her desk. And because she was right in front, the teacher couldn't see it.
Wong the lawyer is also the most disgraceful lawyer Singapore will ever see, mostly because I know every stupid thing she did in school. The form teacher used to call her 'la1 ta4'. Knowing that the fate of criminals, victims and other random people will lie in her ability to practice the law does nothing for my faith in the legal system.
Incidentally, she was also the one who got the whole class hauled to detention.
Moving on once more, to college and beyond. (Sorry if I miss you out, there are too many to mention!)
Ménage à quatre is the new ménage à trois!
Dear, dear FYP. My goodness. I don't even know what to say anymore. The DOP started a fire at our location (I have photographic evidence), the PA started stealth crawling on the floor (I have evidence on tape). What more can I ask for?
Of course, special mention must be made of dear Stealth PA a.k.a Anjali. Remember Stealth Anjali? And When Anjali Attacks? Well there's a new one. It's called When Anjali Crawls. FYP gag reel will be up on Youtube soon.
Meanwhile here is a picture that reminds me of what Yanru did while walking into the LT during the review lecture:
Of course, special mention must be made of dear Stealth PA a.k.a Anjali. Remember Stealth Anjali? And When Anjali Attacks? Well there's a new one. It's called When Anjali Crawls. FYP gag reel will be up on Youtube soon.
Meanwhile here is a picture that reminds me of what Yanru did while walking into the LT during the review lecture:
It's Slimer doing what she was doing, not Eduardo, you doofus. She walked into the LT doing that, and everyone, including the lecturer stared. She froze instantly, and the lecturer tried not to laugh too hard. I can't say the same for the students.
The next person needs no introduction. I don't even need to put up her name, CS people can probably guess who she is, even without seeing her face:
Because there is probably only one person I know who would possibly take a photo like this. (Her name is not Qoo -_-)
And last but not least, remember dear Meatbar/Cripple/The Dainty One?
Meatbar flees the scene - even the fastest shutter speed produced a blurry flash of movement
(Clench-Flex™ action courtesy of Big Guy)
(Clench-Flex™ action courtesy of Big Guy)
Well, she's no longer on crutches, meaning we no longer get sympathy seats from people, she no longer stabs people's toes with her crutches, and we no longer have to jog to keep up with her crutching.
She has also taken to wearing SKIRTS. Behold, you are about to see a once-in-a-lifetime event! (Technically, I've seen it twice, but who cares.)
Meatbar, with two legs.
I hereby dub her 'Miss Hot Legs'. Miss Hot Legs is also known as Miss Quick-we-need-to-Study-For-Examzzzzzzzzzzzzz....
Miss Hot Legs with her face half-obscured, in true dainty fashion
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So anyway, more to come in next post! 2+1 gag reel, my ba-zhang wrapping adventures, pink gaffer tape, and CSI season finale!
(OMG! GSR! My poor, poor GSR! Jorja Fox, sign that damn contract already!!)
Labels: LOL
posted by the soft & poofy one @ 6:20 PM | PermaLink |
